Hi Loves,
It has been Six months
since I last put up a post! With the passion I have for writing I thought I would
be here every other day. Boy was I wrong. A lot has happened these past months… as time goes on, I will reveal all that has happened. First of all… I went
and got myself a job! Yes I mean a proper 9-5. For the past three years I had
been working from home doing some freelance Legal work (a tenancy agreement
here and there, incorporation etc). So here I was, sitting pretty when my husband
(hereinafter referred to as my SO) referred me to a Job advert. I thought why
not? To be honest I wasn’t mentally prepared for a job at the time but you know
what they say about best laid plans? Less than two weeks after I submitted my
CV I was called. My first task before
the interview was to coin an essay on any topic of my choosing within the
parameters of the Insecurity in Nigeria (in the Maritime, Security, Oil and Gas
or Economic sector). Boy do we have Insecurity problems in this Country. I
chose the one area I was most passionate about; maritime. See brethren as soon
as I received the email about writing an essay with maps and everything I just
knew this Job was for me. Everything happened so fast and before I knew it I was
in training. I thought my life had come full circle as I had everything I wanted.
I was none the wiser. Folks, the stress nearly killed me. There was no escaping the horrendous traffic except if you’re my SO and your office
is super close to where you live. I seriously do not know how people are not raving mad in this Lagos.
Hitherto I would wake early only to make
breakfast and kiss my Boo off to work and nestle in for a snug sleep and work
at my own time. An Agreement here; or a Cupcake order there. Lagos traffic
changed my life people of God! It seemed whatever time I woke was certainly not
early enough for these Lagos hustlers. I would meet traffic whether I left the
house at 6.00 am, 0630 am or 8.00 am. Gridlock traffic Lagos can be random like that;
sometimes an accident would mean you’re on one spot for the next 40 minutes.
Suddenly I was
being made to face my fears in a hundredfold. Waking up super early and driving
in bumper to bumper traffic without scratching my car. If you ply that Lekki
epe expressway every morning you know what I’m on about. Never mind that these
Lagos drivers drive like they’re in the jungle. My people, madness abounds. Listen,
you cannot pick one lane and drive peacefully in this City. No there is always
one driver swerving into your lane without so much as indicating. I also think
our good Lord taught me the tenets of Patience in my new 'hustler' life. I would
play a full album of Don Moen while in Traffic and have time to change to Bob
fitts and I still would not have reached my office. Ehen did I mention my
office was in Yaba? Yes. It had to be Yaba. So that this woman that had not fully
conquered driving in this mad place would now not only contend with mad people
on the road but also drive on Third Mainland Bridge to and fro every day. (Thank
you thank you I’m ready for my Super woman cape now). Getting into work mode
was also one hell of a task. I would feel sooooo sleepy during lunch break
that it’s a wonder I didn't lose my mind those early months. By 3 pm I felt the
shards of my control threatening to rip apart. How long could I do this bikonu? Was this what being a career mom was all about? Mbanu. Yet I hung in there. Six
months after, I’m still there.
However my
greatest worry was leaving my child. I
had been Dee’s primary caregiver for 20 full months without help. In human speak that’s one year
and 8 months. I had gone crèche/school hunting (that’s a post for another day). I
reckon I visited any and every structure known to cater for children. I compared
and contrasted to the point of giving myself a migraine. In the end I chose the
one that my spirit agreed with. It was a herculean task the first day I dropped
off my child in School. He is a very bubbly child and the colorful place had
him mesmerized so he didn't cry much but I felt like a wicked wicked stepmother
leaving him with “strangers”. I thought about him allllllll day. His laugh, the
way he would call me ‘mommy’ my son is very affectionate so I especially missed
his cuddles. Nothing could assuage my feelings of guilt not even when his Head
teacher emailed me pictures of him at school. In fact he looked so well settled
that I even felt pangs of jealousy at how easily he had moved on from our daily
routine. Could I ever get through this? Yes I did. Was it painful? Gut wrenchingly
so. However, I have learned so much about myself, my strength and my purpose in these past six
months. I’m still on the road there but I do know now that anything (almost anything
anyway) is possible once you set your mind to it. You know what they say, if
you can survive in Lagos, you can make it anywhere. Hello world I’m ready…
“If
you can’t fly then run
If you
can’t run then walk
If you
can’t walk then crawl
But whatever
you do, you have to keep moving forward”
Martin
Luther King Jnr.
